Choosing your vehicle: The Slayers Guide

January 26, 2015

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When you’re surrounded by zombies, your first reaction is likely “how do I get out of here?”. Choosing a vehicle to escape the undead is serious business, and there are a few things to consider. Where to get gas, how much noise it makes, and how fast it moves are all important factors in making a decision.

We’ll start this off simple, with the trusty bicycle. A bicycle is a solid choice, as it is virtually silent and doesn’t have a gas tank that needs to be filled all the time. Depending on the type of zombie, a bicycle would be an ideal way to escape the undead – and if you get stuck, you could probably even use it as a weapon!

However, if you’ve not been keeping up with your cardio (Rule #1!) a bicycle is going to be hard work. It’s not the best choice for everyone.


Let’s take a look at something a bit more high tech – a helicopter! While a chopper is definitely a cooler choice, realistically it’s probably not going to work out. Imagine – you’re sitting in the chopper, trying to figure out how to get it started. Before you know it, you’re surrounded by zombies looking to make your brains their morning snack! Unless you’re actually a pilot, with access to a lot of fuel, perhaps skip the helicopter!

The most popular choice by far was the tank. Tanks not only look cool, but they are so secure you could even use one as a safe place to sleep! If you know how to drive a car, you’re pretty much sorted for driving a tank, no special skills required. There is the minor issue of gas, but if your run out of fuel you’re still safe inside – unlike if you were in a chopper!

We have to add in another option after overwhelming support during voting – that’s right, a boat! Boats, while still suffering from the same constraints of having to find fuel, are considered safer as it’s generally accepted that zombies can’t swim. Who wouldn’t want to be lazing in the sun on board your yacht, keeping safe far from the decomposing zombie hordes on the mainland!

Read previous installments of the Slayers Guide: #1 “What to do when faced with a zombie”, and #2 “How to relax”!

Share your ideal zombie fighting vehicle in the comments below.